I’ve gotten into a delightful habit this summer of writing on my patio.  It’s a lovely little spot that I’ve turned into a potted herb garden, complete with a vermicompost bin, hand-painted patio furniture, and a beautiful view of a courtyard oasis.  Today, the finches sing around me, the hint of rain is in the air, and my familiar sits in my lap, content to birdwatch and nap.

This is one way I’m learning to feel safe beyond the perimeter of my apartment, silly as it sounds.  I’m getting used to not needing a mask to go out there, getting used to fresh air, and generally getting used to the idea that I can be more mobile now that I’m vaccinated.  Something as simple as using my patio far more frequently than I did last summer, at the height of the pandemic, is something that helps me slowly reorient to how things will be moving forward.

A few weeks after starting this ritual, I made my first masked foray back to my favorite local co-op. Honestly? I could have cried at how wonderful it was to slowly peruse grocery shelves knowing that everyone there was vaccinated and still taking the pandemic seriously.  It was a far cry from frantic shopping and the empty shelves from this time last year.  

I was shocked, in fact, at the profound quiet joy I took in visiting beloved spaces, from the store, to the garden center, to my local diner once I finally worked up the courage to pick up some takeout. I don’t think I realized how much I missed certain things while surviving the past year.  

As an introvert and empath, I’m a natural homebody and much of my energy this past year went into focusing on the comforts of home while keeping my community safe, a true privilege I know.  But I’m now realizing that I didn’t completely let myself feel how much I missed various things because it would have been too painful to process in the midst of an already difficult year.  Instead, I channeled all my energy into living a cottagecore hobbit life and using it as an opportunity to get real about what I wanted my life to be like moving forward.

As with so many other people, I now find myself struggling to reorient myself to our new reality.  This past year has been such a strange mix of seeing a number of groups not taking the pandemic seriously on the one hand, and, on the other, hearing daily of others sufferingly greatly from it.  The thought of running a simple errand felt terrifying for the longest time.  And yet, I knew I couldn’t stay forever in my cozy sanctuary, however tempting.

Post-Vaccine Inertia 

I’m not the only person navigating what some have called the post-vaccine inertia or feel that mask-wearing should still be something that is normalized moving forward, especially in this next year.  It’s impossible to think that we can easily slip into a normal routine without questions of safety and stability running through our minds.  And yet, there’s also a sense of hope and quiet appreciation for the things we’ve taken for granted, like the simple act of chatting with strangers in a cafe or just feeling safe being around other people.

In fact, many people are speculating that this will be the summer of love, which I wholeheartedly endorse (as long as people are doing so safely, of course!).  If this pandemic has taught us anything, it’s that our fundamental humanity, our need to connect with others and enjoy intimate relationships of all kinds, is one of the most sacred and beautiful aspects of life.  I, for one, have realized that I want to be less about work and more about my personal life moving forward.  The things we accomplish in life mean nothing if we don’t have kindred spirits to share them with.  

As I mull all this over, I find myself wondering about the future:

• Where have I been and where am I going?

• What do I want to bring into the future with me?

• What do I want to leave behind?

• Who do I want to welcome into my life?

I suppose these are the kind of questions we all ask after experiencing a trauma. 

Moving Forward 

I don’t have the all answers to the above questions, but I’m slowly getting there.  And I certainly don’t know how to best ease into post-pandemic life, though I’m trying my hardest there, too.  How do we move on without forgetting or dismissing the pain of the last year?  How do we create room for joy and expansion in the face of sorrow?  More questions I continue to marinate on.   Here are a few things I’ve discovered, however, in my own journey into a better way of living:

It’s not over yet. Don’t feel like you have to rush back to what was normal in the past. There’s no such thing, anymore.  What’s more, the pandemic isn’t over yet, so it’s okay to proceed with caution. 

Go slow and listen to the energy.  Speaking of proceeding with caution, it’s okay to go slow as you figure out what feels safe and healthy for you moving forward.  I’ve tried to return to some places and the vibe just feels weird on unsafe, so I don’t go back.  It’s either not my space anymore or it’s not safe for me to be there right now.  Other times, it’s felt like reconnecting with dear loved ones—those are the communities I feel safe returning to.

Know your boundaries. I’ve a lot of friends who have contacted me to hang out.  Honestly?  I’m not there yet.  It feels too strange to meet up with a group of people, albeit a small group.  I’m still trying to figure out how to feel safe doing simple daily activities, let alone adding more people—read: variables—into my life.  Most people understand this, as they’re figuring out what works for them too.  Those that don’t…do you really want that kind of energy in your life?  Just sayin’.

Find joy where you have it.  This year hasn’t been easy and we’re not out of the woods yet.  We don’t know how the variants will affect things or how long it will take for the pandemic to fully end (my guess is likely another year).  Still, that doesn’t mean that you can’t find joy in the process of relearning your communities and getting real about what you want to manifest moving forward in your life.  

So much has changed in this past year.  It’s important to hold space for that and know that this liminal time is all about conjuring a deeper way of connecting with self and others.  As you ease into post-pandemic life, focus on what brings you the most joy, stability, and sense of well-being—and be content with the process of learning what those things mean to you moving forward. That’s all any of us can do!

Enchantment Learning & Living is an inspirational collection of musings touching on life’s simple pleasures, everyday enchantments, and delectable recipes that will guarantee to stir the kitchen witch in you.  If you enjoyed what you just read and believe that true magic is the everyday, subscribe here.

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