Do you let yourself outgrow your constant need to apologize for who you are? Do you refuse to tone down your brightly colored wardrobe so as not to offend those who see the world in black and white with your technicolor? Do you happily turn down unwanted social invitations in favor of more time spent with a good book...or feet on the dance floor? Do you, above all else, strive to be the best you, the most you-est you there is? Yes. Yes. Yes. And yes.
Those are your answers, felt deep in your bones, echoed in the beating of blood in your veins. For the first time in a long time, you find yourself feeling you-er than you, the you-est you've ever been. It started slowly, with the satisfaction of saying no--your voice strong and clear--no you will not do that, then onto another small step forward when you admitted to yourself that what you really wanted to do was stay home and tend your garden, and so you did. From there it happened all at once: the you-ness.
You found yourself in mountain pose, gazing at your herb plants, breathing deeply (in and out, in and out) when you realized you were the you that you wanted to be. No more going through the motions or pretending to be a version of yourself more palatable to the rest of the world. No more going through the motions of the you that you wanted to be, keeping the flimsy performance of that persona, a brittle shell without substance or roots. It took time and more patience you thought you had, but, one breath, one act, one thought at a time, you took the hope of being more you and nourished it until it burst from its seed. It reached down into the earth and up into the sky, wild roots planting you firmly to this world, delicate stems and leaves reaching upward, bringing the sun to you.
It is a delicious feeling and an ephemeral one, being you. And yet it gets stronger the more you listen to that voice that would rather walk barefoot all day and gaze at the stars, the one that can go a whole day in happy solitude--or joyfully spin across a dance floor as she does twirl in the moonlight. You want to get to know this you, continue to blossom, allow your roots weaving themselves into the dirt and your stem, leaves, and petals reaching for the sun to represent the fullest expression of yourself each and every day, growing into the you-est you've ever been.
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